Who steals the breadstick off of a plate? Uncool! I love my bread! You can't just take it!…I can’t believe the nerve of some guys. I went on a date with one who was, for all intents and purposes, very nice. He picked me up and took me to dinner. Going well so far… We had good conversation, (though he was a little louder than my “normal guy” taste), and a nice meal. He had finished his 4 courses and I was still nursing my salad. It was a great salad but I was eating slowly while we talked. As he finished his food, he reached across the table and took my breadstick off the side of my plate….huh?…what the?…HEY!…That’s my breadstick!…I was savoring that tasty, delicious, carbohydrate treat for after I was done with my lettuce. Unbelievable!…I thought that maybe it was just an oversight. He probably didn’t even realize he did it…unless of course he thought that since he was paying for the meal, my plate was his too?…AAGH! If that’s the case, I’ll buy my own dinner! I went home and dismissed the issue as a mistake on his part and decided that since I was always accused of not giving guys a chance, I would try one more time with him the following week.
The next week came along…different restaurant, different menu, SAME BREAD ABDUCTION! That’s MY gosh darn bread! Don’t get between a girl and her bread. What is up with that? He called again after that night and left me a message. “Hey Calamaria! Calalamadingdong, Calamazustiphan!…wanna get together this week?”…um…nope….and don’t call me that! Yuck! This is why overly outgoing guys turn me off! If I want to hang out with an obnoxiously loud bread thief, I’ll stay at home by myself! At least that way I only have myself to blame!
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