Thursday, October 29, 2009

Don’t Reign on my Parade…

It was pouring rain this morning! There is something so peaceful about a rainstorm. I pulled up to work and my windshield wipers were beating out of time with the drops and I reminisced about how my ex used to rant at me when I didn’t turn the windshield wipers off when I stopped the car. Huh?…I wasn’t exactly sure what his reasoning was, but I think it was something to do with him not wanting them to come on when the car started again. Apparently the whole car would be ruined if they tried to wipe a dry window?…not really sure…but I realized that his rage had played in my head for years each time I’ve pulled my car up to a parking place when it was raining! I had been inadvertently programmed to always turn them off! Kind of funny actually…I was like one of Pavlov’s Dogs. I wondered what else he had programmed me to think about that truly didn’t matter. I was carrying a black umbrella today…and I was wearing a brown coat!…OMG! I sat in my car laughing at myself as I watched people frantically running to the building so they wouldn’t mess up their hair! Luckily my hair didn’t look all that great today anyway and I have found that no one even notices my hair if I have the right lipgloss on! I can save any rainy day with a ponytail holder and a sparkling smile! So what was I going to do about these beating windshield wipers?…Maybe if I left them on, the car would be gone when I returned?…or possibly the windshield would have a giant ‘L’ painted on it for the word “Loser that left her windshield wipers on?”…I had no idea what was about to happen to me…but I threw caution to the wind and left them on – on the FASTEST SETTING!…then I turned the stereo up all the way, shut off the car, got out with my black umbrella, clicked the lock to the door and walked slowly through the storm knowing full well that I was going to forget that I had done that when I started the car again this evening! Surely I would find it hilarious all over again!…It was a little prank that I had just played on myself that would be sure to make the end of the day as fun as the beginning! I childishly stomped through the puddles as I giggled all the way to the building. I kept thinking, “You’re not the boss of me! Ha!”…it was that same sort of freedom that a girl feels when she breaks into her ex’s house, rearranges his furniture and leaves lasagna on the table with a note that reads, “Heart! Me!” No harm done- but extremely funny!

So the question now, is how many things in the day are influenced by what other people have programmed us to think is right? I suppose it could be nearly everything if we let it be. I certainly know the difference between right and wrong and there is no doubt that I am old enough to make decisions for myself…but…everything we do, in one way or another, is a relived experience from our past. We cook foods that remind us of other times. We dance traditional dances that our grandparents danced years before us. For the most part, we don’t even know why we do. We just do. How important to us are these things really? Do we need to run between the raindrops so our hair stays perfect? Or can we just giggle our way through the day like a child? I’m going to start to invent a tradition that starts with me each day. Today…it’s going to be annoying myself by getting into my car and being blasted out by loud techno music and the sound of windshield wipers wiping dry glass!…giggle…Now that’s all mine!

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