Love is on sale!

I got an email from a dating site today. It’s heading was “Love is on sale!”…well! If it’s on sale, I should pick up a spare! How could I let this opportunity to buy cheap love pass me by! It came just in the nick of time too! I was almost out of my old love. Well…actually I had diluted it with water way back when so I could take my time to decide what type wouldn’t leave those tough to get out stains. It’s so nice to know that the spam emailers were so concerned about little ‘ole me that they sent me this personalized “love coupon!” My heart is leaping with anxious desire! I wonder whom I will pick! Should I sleep on the sidewalk outside so when I get there all the good ones aren’t picked over? I know! I’ll run through the door the minute the sale starts and pick up as many as I can and then go through them in the corner by myself to sort out the size 0’s and 16’s. I guess I could pick up an 8 and cut it down to a 4-6 if that’s all that’s left. This is truly the happiest day of my life! I knew I was holding out for something wonderful! What a great bargain!