Saturday, October 31, 2009

The Perfect Hostess Gift

I walked into the ladies room this morning and noticed that someone had left cases and cases of toilet paper in there. I instantly knew that one of my colleagues had obviously complained that there had been none so someone had delivered us 48 rolls. Yep! Thank you. That should definitely do it. I think 48 is a good amount. While I was washing my hands, I flashed to a story. That’s what I do when I wash my hands because someone said that in order to get your hands clean and prevent the spread of the flu, we need to wash our hands as long as it takes to sing happy birthday twice. I wasn’t sure about the BPM on this suggestion and have never really been a fan of the song, so I usually wash them for as long as it takes me to write a short attention deficit hallucination!


Hap-py birth-day to—you---(the music played as the scene faded from color to black and white. I was standing outside the home of a neighbor ringing the doorbell.)
She came to the door all dressed in a white knee-length dress like one worn in the old episodes of “The Patty Duke Show.”


I smiled at her and offered her the hostess gift I had wrapped in a gift bag with a large red bow hanging from the handle. I said, “Thank you for having us!”

She looked into the gift bag to find a 10 pack of Charmin toilet paper. She looked up at me…back at the bag…then back at me and said, “You shouldn’t have! Thank you.” I said, “Oh no! You’re very welcome!”


She set the bag on the counter next to the 8 bottles of wine that all the other guests had brought. I felt the pride of knowing that I had brought something truly useful this evening and she’d remember my thoughtfulness for weeks to come!


Scene fades out…my hands are clean…


Well! (I giggled to myself!)…I had had yet another useful moment multitasking mundane household tasks!…I went about my day wondering if I could get a good deal on a few cases of toilet paper for the Holiday Party season…or else…I could just bring my bag to that restroom from this morning and steal a roll or two each day…That would definitely class up the idea for sure!

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