Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Calia at a Mother's day brunch!

I have to think that people mean well! I was sitting at the table with my mother and enjoying my water and hydroxy-cut casserole listening to women talking about all of their trials and tribulations of motherhood. Smile, nod, smile...uh huh...

Woman: So mother's day must be so hard for you! You're all alone and you don't even have a dog!
My head: (oops...it looks like you got your boob stuck in your pants zipper, let me help you!)

~pause~

Me: Yeah... but i'm really busy working on all sorts of things. Besides, I'm waiting 10 years so my three headed baby can have an IQ of 420 and eventually help cure that brain defect that makes people want to say mean things!

My head: (crap...I don't think that response was any nicer than the first one... at least i'm working on it...)

Calia's Cards for Single women without children:

Mother's Day Card 1
Roses are yellow
Violets are blue
You can't find a fellow
But your hair sure looks good!

Mother's Day Card 2
Special days like this are for sharin'
Too bad children are a sparin'
Maybe one day you'll be good as me
and we'll hear your name on late night TV (love, Casey Anthony)

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